a dear friend and "mate"

a dear friend

challenges you

shows compassion

and kindness

and cares.

a dear friend taught me

true hospitality

true gentleness

what it means to be "church"

what it means to be family

outside those brick walls.

my dear friend

my "mate"

will be missed.

my dear friend was

a blessing.

belfast

will never be the same

without David.

but we can rest assured

he is Home.

 

I checked my email Tuesday morning and found that a member of the church in Belfast I served in had passed away after a near three year battle with cancer. David and I grew close over my time in Northern Ireland. He and his wife Carol's house became my home away from home and I got to know the Rankins incredibly well. I now realized how blessed I was to have done so.



Kendra, me, David & Carol

David taught me many things through the year.  He taught me the importance of questioning and seeking to learn about your faith.  Depending on your pastor, if David was in your congregation then his inquisitive nature would quickly make him either a favorite member or a complete pest!  He always wanted to know more about God's grace, His loving nature, and faith in general.

David, together with Carol, taught me what it means to truly be hospitable.  If they knew I was coming over, there were always snowballs or Jammy Joeys waiting for me, my two favorite Belfast buns.  But even if they knew I wasn't going to come over, and I just swung by, I knew I would be welcomed into their home not as a friend but as family.  It didn't matter what time it was, I would be welcomed in as family and share in all the joys that come with being part of a family.  That, as I have come to understand it, is a major part of hospitality.

On Friday nights during my year, I met with David and a few other men for a weekly Bible study.  David always picked me up for the Bible study since I didn't have a car.  I'd usually be reading in our kitchen until I heard his horn honk around 7:15 and then I would run downstairs and we'd head off.  One evening, I climbed into the car, we took the first turn and coming down the road were the Mormon missionaries.  I made a comment along the lines of "There's the Mormons," and David quickly put me in my place. "That's how I would've said something like that about Catholics thirty years ago."  From that moment on I couldn't quit thinking about ecumenical/interfaith relationships.  My next one-on-one meeting with Doug, our site coordinator in Belfast, was all about that one little comment David made. He may not have known it, but I am still constantly thinking about that challenge David put in front of me with one little reply and am excited to engage in and explore how we can do positive ecumenical and interfaith work together.

I learned thankfulness from David. I know that I've been incredibly privileged in my life and have had many opportunities that other people have not or could not, but I think, that when faced with death, I would only be able to look at the downside of life ending. David, on the other hand, was thankful for all that he has had. When we would pray, I would see David shaking his head and hear him remark, "All He's given me already and I still ask him to heal me." His outlook was incredible. He knew his blessings and he cherished them. When we so often want more, more, more, David showed me how to be thankful for what you have, especially those around you.

our Friday night group

David also showed me how to fully care for someone. When Kendra and I were having issues with our debit cards, David phoned me daily to ask if we were doing okay in terms of money. We always were but he called anyways. More importantly than that, when I wanted more than anything to have one last men's Bible study my last week in Belfast, David made it happen. Nevermind the fact that every single speed bump hurt for David to drive over. It literally hurt him because of the stage the cancer was at. And there are a lot of speed bumps in Belfast. But it didn't matter. I believe he wanted to care for me spiritually as well and knew that one of the moments I would cherish most, not only from my time in Belfast, but in my life, would be that last time that Finian, Bobby, Alan, David and I gathered around Alan's table to share tea, buns, fellowship and the Word.

For all of these things, I am thankful for the time I was fortunate enough to get to know and serve beside David. While he will be missed, I can rest assured that my "mate" is Home.

David, Carol, me and their grandson Riley